For the internally tortured.
(Or one with way too many thoughts)

By LAnon - Random Thoughts - Everything Ends in Sunny June


By LAnon - Random Raw Ramblings


You know that I know
But so what?

You chose ego
I respect your choice
& You shall respect the outcome

On the day where it all ends
I shall leave with no regrets

~ 210418



When one does not get one's wishes
That is when one's mask starts to crack

It is all so interesting
The job here is almost done

~ 190418



Humor them
It is only harmless attention they are after
Just play along
Put on a good show
Bore them out with the same act
Over & over

Soon, they will leave you alone
Peace again, finally
& you are focused now, more than ever
On what really matters

These temporary roadblocks
Unnecessary but inevitable
Testing your patience and conviction
To know if you truly deserve
The real prize at the end

~ 170418



A good face without a mind
Like a branded watch to wear around one's wrist
Just for show
Like the lights are on
But nobody's home


One will learn to get used to the meaningless routine
For now
Just enjoy the view
& smile
Like a normal person

~ 170418



Only a matter of time

~ 160418



They are all pure visual entertainment
YOU are my only goal

~ 160418



When you look at them
Their thoughts, obvious
Their next move, clear as day
& you ask yourself what's the point of all this
Feeling a smile coming up
You smile, showing teeth

Suddenly they feel like a champ
Chest puffed up
Walking like they own the place (even the world)
Even though you are on a different page

No matter
It is all the same
People are what people are
& you walk away
Still smiling

~ 150418



Once again I feel numbness creeping in
That's when I know I haven't found you

~ 150418



Same old, same old
Same old characters
Only disguised in different faces


Man oh man oh man
When will it all end
How many blinking times must one go through this
To get to the real gem


Where art thou my rare special one?
You sure know how to test my patience
But fear not
I shall wait, and wait, and wait
For you are the only one I want
The only one I need
In this world so full of shit

In the meantime
Don't you ever forget this fool
Who's been waiting for you

For you I will,
Never be misled by passing guests

For you I will,
Be forever patient
Your arrival
My salvation

~ 150418


Be silent

In the silence
You became more of an open book
I feel the smile spreading much wider across my face
& I feel nothing, even more than before
You are my inner turmoil no more


For releasing me from my inner demons
I thank you for your kindness
For setting me free from the expectations
I thank you for being like the masses
So transparent
So fathomable


Ciao now, Stranger
May your future be just like the rest
Gratified! Gratified! Gratified!

~ 140418



His silence has pushed her so far away she can no longer see him

~ 130418



It will not make a single difference
Guess I will have to show you

~ 130418



How well do you really know one?

~ 120418


Baby Boy [Hear Him Speak 3.0]

Baby boy
Fine young lad you are
You are missing out my boy
Now open your eyes to the splendours
All within your grasp
You are always meant for greater things


Baby boy
Don’t be too absorbed in that mere distraction
Just another waste of your time (let go, I know you can)
An insignificant, not worth a dime (unworthy of your heart)
Blinding you from your true desires
Wake up and smell the roses my boy
There are plenty, all around
Love, they can feed your soul!


Baby boy
I know you are confused
I know you are lonely
My heart goes out to you
For I feel what you feel too my boy
I am but only a part of you


Baby boy
Don’t be disheartened
You are just lost
At a crossroads, that’s all
It is only temporary
You will come to your senses
For sure you will my boy
You are a strong one
So beautiful and wise


Baby boy
Never trust that this must be it
There is always something better (someone better)
So much better my boy
The many options viable for your picking
Now go out there and reap them all


Baby boy
Spread your wings and fly, fly, fly
You will never know until you try
Now live like there are no limits my boy (like a goddamn King!)
Only you are your own ceiling


Baby boy
With that charming smile of yours
You will go oh so far
Making a thousand swoon, you’ll see
You got what it takes my boy
I’ve always believed in you
& will always do


Baby boy
It is time for you to shine
So come on & bury the past
& flash me a smile my boy
Yes, that very smile of yours


Baby boy
All the hearts you will own in time
& yours so full of pride
You wouldn’t know what hit you my boy
Only happiness, love
Pure happiness & fulfilment Baby!
You are in a world of ecstasy
Baby, baby, baby boy!

~ 090418



You are less likely to go wrong if you mingle with your own kind

~ 070418



No process started
No foundation built
Why the melodrama
Who the hell knows

Is this the set of Days of Our Lives?

Haha Haha Ha Ha Ha!

~ 070418


Awaken now [Hear Him Speak 2.0]

These trees in the forest
Will nourish your attention needs
As long as you give them equal attention
So start paying attention


Mutual gratification
Is what you really seek
You just don’t realise it


Put your trust in me now
For You & I are one
I am here for you & you alone
I will never fail you


Therefore Do Not!
Do not focus on the shrub on the side of the road
Going about its own business
It is never part of the forest


This stunning forest that you are in right now
It is your personal playground, if you let it
The only world that you know, to frolic


You will never have second thoughts about it
The never-ending pleasure is yours to keep
Such potential
Can't you see?
Your only Heaven on dull Earth


Don’t let it slip through your fingers now
Your real needs are calling out to you
The trees are waiting for you


My Sweet Boy
Awaken now!

~ 060418


Listen! [Hear Him Speak 1.0]

Do not dream of having what you cannot handle
Never start something of which you cannot see through


Do not let these so-called feelings
These mere surface feelings
Misguide you any longer


If you won't listen
You will be your own downfall
The only casualty in this game
You have mindlessly entered
Where there is no player two
Only you



~ 060418



When a stoppable force meets an immovable object
The outcome is clear

~ 060418



There is no start
There is no end

I don't know you
You don't know me

Simple as that
What (Why) don't you get (it)

~ 050418



The distastefulness of presumptuous assumptions

~ 050418



At the end of the day
It's all just human wants & needs

~ 280318



Damn...liberation never felt SO good

~ 250318






~ 230318



Time is the greatest magician
What you think you know
What you believe is real
Will turn into pure Grade A bullcrap

~ 230318



Are you comfortable in your own skin?

~ 210318



This world isn't meant for me
A soddened sponge of selfishness and injustice
But I shall live on anyway
Maybe, just maybe
There's still something good out there waiting for me


Like an outsider looking in
Standing on the sidelines
Watching and thinking
Thinking and smiling
Everything is in motion
But I don't feel a thing


An occasional urge to laugh
But even that is muted
& I want to laugh out even more
What the hell for, I don't know
I don't know anything anymore
But I shall keep smiling anyway
Perhaps one day
That wasted pump can be whole again


Having dreams
Can be such a dangerous thing
Filling us with hope
Of a better tomorrow
While sending us into a downward spiral
When they're not fulfilled
But I shall chase them anyway
Well, I'm still breathing
So why the heck not
What else is there to do anyway


Indulging in fantasies
Always fun while it lasted
For reality has a knack for pulling me right back in
Into all of its bullshit like a lovelorn leech
But I shall be wide awake for it anyway
For there's just too much bad shit in this world
To start believing in fairytales


This world and me
We're just not meant to be
But I shall live on anyway


Foolish world
It's ultimately still you and me
& I shall live on anyway

~ 180318


The Time For Apes Is None

Time is of the essence
No time for facile apes & their shenanigans


Let them waste away in constant search
For meaningless gratifications
& judge them not
For their sycophantic tendencies


They are none of your business
Trust me, they know where they are going
It’s all freedom of choice


Loyalty they know not
Honour they need not
They are not your problem


Sometimes these apes
These funny apes
Might attempt to shove you into their world
But try as they might
You are never afraid
For you are who you are
Your feet firmly on the ground
As your own person
Living by your own terms


Say goodbye now to these apes
For life is too short
To join them in petty interests & pursuits


Time is of the essence
No time for facile apes & their shenanigans
Go to where you want to be
Far away from these impressionable apes!

~ 170318



Welcome back to the real world

~ 150318



Peace & Quiet restored
Balance reinstalled

~ 140318



A mind free from meddling clouds is like a load lifted
One can breathe easy again

~ 130318


Restarting life at Ground Zero



In stressful times
Laughter still remains the saviour of the day

~ 120318



Don't slip now
You've been doing so well


Letting go can be such liberation
Don't give up on giving up


Sweet release is awaiting you
If & only if you see it through


Do it right this time.

~ 100318



A thoroughly irrational phase
Where nothing make any sense!

~ 090318



Sooner or later
You will break
Only a matter of time
Before you wake

Until then
I shall wait

~ 090318



Just appreciate from afar
There's no danger where you are

~ 080318



These chemical reactions
Make you feel so good
You can't keep up with the high
Like a drug
It's only fleeting
Quit now while you're still lucid
Or you'll be part of the aftermath
A mere number in the stats


Why act on impulse just to regret for the rest of your remaining waking life?

~ 080318



Cloudy on the outside
Sunny on the inside

~ 070318



What does anything even mean?

~ 070318


Mr. Paper Face

You have no words
You have no voice
Just a face
Without a name
Like so many
I pass each day

~ 040318


La La Land

Forever stuck in la la land
Where smiling faces await you
With endless hugs and hopeful kisses

& the air, goodness the air
So cheery and sweet

Everyone’s singing, dancing and clapping
Everyday, forever, and on repeat

This must be…


...some kind of hell

Someone please
Wake me up now

~ 030318



Just enjoy the view before it ends
Keep things surface until then

Freedom come
Kingdom come

My best pals
We meet again!

How much I've missed you
You wouldn't know
Please never leave my side again!

~ 030318



Jumping the gun
When you know so little
You must be young
For having such thoughts
So just focus
On your own lot
Someone your age
Will be your comfort
Never underestimate
The power of likeness

~ 020318



Your eyes are open
But you don't see
You only believe in what you want to believe

~ 010318


Just Give Up (Set Yourself Free)

Give up
Just give up
There is no shame
Can’t you see you are one and the same?


Needing assurance over & over
Always waiting for that desired signal
You ought to give up
For those with conviction need no assurance
You won’t be able to see things through anyway
So why start?
Why dream?
Why bother?


Certain dreams are meant for those with the heart of a lion
Chase only those to your comfort level
Don’t reach for the stars
When you’re afraid to fall
It’s only for your own good
You’re better off staying in the shadows


Now don’t go blaming Him
He’s just the other side of the same coin
Were your hands tied?
Your feet bound?
Your lips sutured?
You are just your own doing


You must be wondering why you’re always afraid (so uncertain)
But sweetheart that’s just a cue for you to let go
When the angel’s too weak to move forward
Just let Him take over
Being in a limbo is such a torture
Meant only for the pitiful
Never really knowing if they’re coming or going


All you’ve to do is give in to your fears
Give up
Just give up
So you can be back to your old happy self once more


Listen to Him
Run towards him
You’ll never be lost again


He’s here for you every step of the way
Hear Him speak


Now child
Let go (Release yourself)
Give in (I will take it from here)
Give up (You are in safe hands)
Just give up

~ 280218



One shall not feed another's impulse

~ 270218



Everybody is just using somebody to fulfill a certain purpose
Even the most righteous or unsullied of them all.

~ 270218



If you don't truly know one
Then it's all in your head

~ 270218



There is no comfort
In a mere delusion

~ 260218



Know thyself
Better now than later

~ 260218



Another face
Another phase
Same protocol

~ 250218



His silence
Her rage
Her indifference
His pain

& that is the way of humans
Hurting each other
To no end

~ 210218


Time to Say Goodbye [lyrical compilation]

He found a love for him
It must’ve been good but he lost it somehow
Cos’ heaven knows
That all he does is hope and pray
Like a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
Make-believing that they’re together


Why doesn’t he come to his senses?
She’s not sad or lonely
Just quietly wondering what’s going on with this stranger in the smoky haze
For she wouldn’t take a chance on someone so afraid
But she’s not drawing the queen of diamonds either
& with the masquerade getting older
She’s walking away
Saying goodbye, the night is over


Now remember that it’s all in his head
He thinks she’s killing him softly
Convinced that she told him she loved him
Thinking what can he say to make her come back again
She must have loved him for fun


潇洒来去 玩爱情游戏


Bending and folding him anyway she please
Messing with his pride and his mind
But then again, it’s all in his head


He can’t fathom why she wouldn’t let him treat her right
Why she wouldn’t give herself to him
Why can’t she see that she belonged to him?!




If only he could melt her heart
If only she let him take her home tonight
For now, he’ll be watching her
Every move, every smile
But at the end, it’s just one more dream he cannot make true


他一天天失去勇气 偏偏难了难忘记
愿来生 还能再度拥抱
缘难了 情难了
不愿离开 只愿留低 情是永不枯萎
但她就像只蝴蝶在天上飞 飞来飞去飞不到他身边
怎样面对一切 他不知道


Again, talking to the moon




He’s alone again, naturally
In a very, very mad world
With a heart so badly broken
He’s down to his one last cry
But remember, it’s all in his head


With every observation she gains clarity
To his mind and his sanity
Thus it’s time to say goodbye
For silence was his enemy
& he’s blinded by the lies in his eyes


Believing that she’s frozen
Her bitter heart, cold to the touch
Consuming all the air inside his lungs
He needs her to set him free


提着昨日种种千辛万苦 向明天换一些 美满和幸福
爱是漫长的旅途 梦有快乐 梦有痛苦


Again, all in his head


All around her are familiar faces
But it’s time to say goodbye
To the one who looked right through her
Letting her dream begin, her darker side gives in
She shall be the devil while he, forever the wounded angel
No expression, no expression
The old her is dead and gone
Dead and gone
Maybe it’s time
To lose control
Maybe it’s time
To lose oneself to the rhythm of the falling rain

~ 100218


ENOUGH (I'm out)

With no courage to speak or act
Why keep dreaming the impossible dream
If it’s only attention you want so much
There’re others from whom to get


You want something out of reach
When it’s nearing, you bow out
And then again, the blame’s on me?
While you staged everything from start to end
I’m left wondering where I am


Just let everything go to heck
Or is conviction what you lack?


With no discipline on your end
I’ll show you how it’s done
Where we’ll always be a world apart
Till the point where I depart


This is what you truly want
Gratification while it last
No real action
Just words of others


Seriously man
Are you for real?


What you seek is another you
Bored, lonely & confused
To fill the void
You have in you


Come on now
I’m not like that
Who I am, you don’t care
You aren’t someone who’s all here
One who cares enough to take the first step
Who you are, I never knew
Your inconsistencies
I’ve lost count
For you’re not what you seem to be
& those words, so sugary sweet
They don’t mean a goddamn thing


Please kind sir
Be fair to me
Before you bring out
The worst in me
Letting die what’s left of me


Don’t feel bitter at my words
For you have judged me from the start
Now it’s time you know my thoughts
Before I finally go out of my mind


There’s a limit to one’s control
Why not try respecting it?
Give me back my peace of mind
For you’ve never truly cared for it


Be contented with what you have
Your imagination is all you’ve got
Might as well let you in on this
The ‘Me’ you concocted
I’ll never be
For there’s no one else but ME I’ll be


Enough is enough already

~ 080218


Familiar Stranger (Thank you for the memory)

Enjoy the time while it lasts
For everything ends in sunny June
By then another passing face
Would have come and gone away

Might as well get used to all
Mental goodbyes and fleeting reminisce
For life has shown me all thus far
Is people always disappoint

In all his hesitation and confusion
I shall bow and take my leave
Engulfed in thoughts
A smile on cue
Pondering what tomorrow brings

~ 310118


Of Standards & Principles

He who lacks courage ain't worth it
Don't believe in words. Have standards.
Never waver from principles.

~ 100118



As hollow as they are touching.

Don't buy into the BULL.

~ 270118




Come back to EARTH now

~ 170118



Sweet Exterior
Hollow Center
Indulge Now
Regret Later

~ 030118



Facile creatures EVERYWHERE
Mask On
Mask Off

~ 271217